Hold Her Arms Up

It’s hard to believe that everyone has difficult seasons and that sometimes, life is not at all how you planned or hoped it would be. Everyone goes through it.

How do you react when it happens to you?

How do you react when it happens to someone else?

These last few months have been difficult for me. Which is why I haven’t written in a few weeks. It has been hard to find beauty in my mess, mostly because I was avoiding anything God related and anything life related. I wanted to live in my own world that didn’t include people, rules, words, expectations, responsibilities, anything at all. I always get to a specific door, where on the other side my destiny and my ministry await, but I get too scared to walk through so I stand at the window, looking in at what I could have and who I could be. 

And today, I am finally at the crossroads where it’s time to make a decision.

I am either in. or I am out.

And both have consequences and sacrifices, but I have chosen to stay in the fight and be in.

Walking out this season, I have realized that I haven’t been myself. These last few weeks, maybe I was grumpy, or moody, or irresponsible, or rebellious, or aggressive, or restless, or anxious, or unsure, or sad, or mad, or confused.

And maybe all of them all at once.

And then, as I recollect, refocus, relight the fire… I have a glimpse of grace. Grace is when God chooses to take me back and love me anyway. Grace is God allowing me to feel His love and His presence, letting His word take my heart, my mind, and my thoughts captive so that my eyes can lock with His.

Grace is…. Him & I once more.

And then I think to myself…… wow, do I even do that for me?

And one step further, do I do that for others?

The answer is no. I judge myself and hold myself to a standard, which is not wrong, but it’s exhausting when I have my eyes on my own strength and not what He can do. I take myself out of the fight because I didn’t get it right the first time…… but what if this is the 10th time and I am still not getting it right? His strength, not mine.

And then to those around me…. I expect them to walk without failure, to be kind, to be present, to be available, to love me, to support me, to protect me. Yet, I haven’t quite figured out how to do all those things for myself, much less for others.

So here’s an apology. To myself, to you, and to God, I am sorry I haven’t extended grace and I am sorry that I have expected too much out of you. I get it. It is inevitable to make mistakes and miss the mark because we are humans.

Forgive me for not extending grace to you and to our battles. Each person fights their battles and feels like they’re drowning so I am sorry if I haven’t made that process easier for you.

And to God, my sweet sweet Jesus… Forgive me for taking this life for granted. For taking so long to lift my hands to worship and for standing outside the window, watching, instead of turning the knob and stepping in by faith. Fear has gotten the best of me and I dropped my eyes to look at the road, rather than keeping them locked with your gaze.

I also ask that if you have friends around you in difficult seasons, that you hold them up and show them the same grace we have received.

The Bible says in Exodus 17:10-12

So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset.

Aaron and Hur held Moses’ hands up because if they went down for any reason, the battle would be lost. This is the same act we should do for each other. You never know when someone might be on their last ounce of strength and when they need you to simply hold their arms up until the morning comes.

Don’t be so quick to judge when your people are not themselves. Life can be tough so let’s hold the arms up and win the battle as we stand right next to them.

Forever Dancing In His Love,

Leslie Tatiana

 

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Good Shoes take you good places

If you haven’t noticed by all my OOTD’s on insta (@leslietatianap) I am a LOVER of shoes. A pair of cute shoes can turn my entire LIFE around. I am more of a heel type of girl but I will not fight any type of cute shoe! Especially in the summer and on #StreetStyle type days. This is officially my first ever fashion only post but that’s a little impossible for me so I’m combining my love for fashion and a little encouragement today.

Between my sweet mom and I, we have over 60 pairs of shoes and some of them, are over 10 years old because my mom is just that hip and amazing and takes care of things, unlike me. I am so excited to share with you my favorite Summer shoes. It was a really tough decision but I chose all the bright colors and comfy ones I love. 
Processed with VSCO with t1 presetThe Yellow Sandals are a new addition from JustFab and the perfect color for all things sun. I paired these with a white dress on Easter but I can’t wait to mix with other prints and colors this Summer.  The chunky block heel makes it an easy choice because they are comfy enough to walk in and the open toe is perfect for hot days. $40 if you are a member. Sign Up Here!  Processed with VSCO with t1 preset

These Teal Wedges are so dang CUTE!!! I tried looking for them to link them and I can’t find them anymore. But I love this bright, yet soft teal color. Don’t be afraid to try on a pair of shoes that look different because you might actually like them on. These are from Qupid. Take a look at their wedges. They are super cute and Summer ready!

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When has Steve Madden ever failed you!?!? The correct answer is never! This is a pair we’ve had for at least 8 years now and they come in handy when I least expect! The heel is short enough to wear for long hours and check out that bow! This deep Teal is perfect to combine with other blues and greens.

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Again, Steve Madden! These are the perfect pop of color to add to any outfit! Especially anything white. These again are over 7 years old but guess what!? I was able to find them on Poshmark & someone is selling them for $30. Size 7 & Size 6.5

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You can never go wrong with a simple pair of brown wedges! I love these though because the straps are so unique and braided. Also, I would never have bought these because they have “too” much going but when I put them on, I fell for them lol These are super comfy, I can wear these all day! I bought them at Payless but found them for $10 on Poshmark! Size 8

Those are my favorite types of heels for the summer! Bright, comfy, and different! Be a little bold and choose the shoes you would never wear, you might actually love them. ❤

“How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of the messenger who brings good news, the good news of peace and salvation, the news that the God of Israel reigns!” -Isaiah 52:7

I LOVE this bible verse. It literally is telling you that the steps, the feet of those who bring good news are beautiful. This verse challenges me to be someone who not only carries good news daily, but someone who is constantly sharing peace and the truth of salvation- that Jesus died for our sins to save us and give us a new tomorrow. I choose to be a woman who is made up of this good news about Jesus, not just a 20 something year old with a fashion sense but nothing more to offer. Not only should you have cute shoes, but you should also walk in those shoes with such a purpose and such an authority that your entire atmosphere around you changes. Do you know the power you carry within you?! Be someone who carries good news, who changes the atmosphere in your group of friends, who walks in faith and not only in cute shoes, but in peace and salvation! Don’t you feel more powerful, more confident, more prepared when you have a cute set of shoes on your feet!? Well imagine that + carrying good news so that others can find the same joy!

Good shoes take you good places!

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Forever Dancing in His Love.

with cute heels + good news,

Leslie Tatiana

Embrace the Mess

MAY 1ST YALL!

If you know anything about me- May 1st is my favorite along with May 30th, my birthday.  Since my 18th birthday, birthdays have been a huge deal for me, both good and bad. I’m not kidding when I tell you that God always does something crazy in my life as my birthday comes up. I have learned so many lessons as each year passes and sometimes, I make them more difficult because…. HELLO?! Human. And other times, I simply ride the waves and accept the lesson. Nonetheless, I am in the middle of learning something now, and it’s no coincidence that my birthday is in 29 days.

I have been so overwhelmed with my mess. I look at the people around me, friendships, church family, social media, etc. and I think to myself “why can’t I be more like them? why am I such a mess?”

I am tired of trying to change myself to match others.

I know that life isn’t supposed to be all tears, all drama, all indecisive, but the truth is that is where I am, and that has to be okay because it’s temporary. It’s so hard to admit that you are not 100% okay and that you are still a little broken, still a little confused, still a little mess. But then why would I need God? The whole process of healing, of forgiving, of moving on, of letting go, of growing doesn’t happen over night. That’s why it’s called a PROCESS.

I was thinking all day yesterday about who I wanted to be this year, what I wanted to accomplish, what I wanted to let go of, what I wanted 23 to be about.

And I realized it’s so easy to try and change everything I hate about myself in 4 weeks, key word, TRY. But let’s be real…. I’m gonna be exhausted, still the same girl, and only bitter that I wasted my entire month. So instead, I am going to accept who I am, where I am at, and just focus on each day that passes, as I look to my goals. People around me are always challenging me, making me better, and correcting me so that I am the best me I can be. This isn’t a bad thing. But it is easy to get wrapped up in trying to be the best leader tomorrow, the ministry director at 3:00pm, pastor at 3:01pm. And I always want to speed up the process and just get it done already, but then I am reminded there is beauty is the whole thing, not just the destination.

So here are the things I struggle with. Filtered and controlled, they serve a purpose but regardless, I will choose to love myself where I am today.

  1. I talk too much…. But this is such a gift because I will always have something to talk about & not be afraid to get on a mic and talk away. I am almost positive that others wish they could talk as easily as it comes to me.
  2. I’m too intense…. but you will always know where I am, you will never have to doubt what I am feeling or where I stand because I will be very clear. I am passionate about everything I do and what a great way to live life, passionately.
  3. I love too hard….. When did this become a bad thing?!
  4. I can’t make up my mind about anything….. I am so creative and such a quick learner, I can have a million options on anything and what a beautiful thing to never be stuck.
  5. I am too sensitive…. Which I am thankful for today because after everything life has thrown, what a beautiful reminder that my heart has not grown cold and hard.

These are just a few of the things on my heart. I’m sure there is more but instead of looking for more reasons to change myself, I choose to embrace where I am today and what I want to accomplish this year of 23. I cannot tell you how excited I am for this new year. It’s the middle of other huge ages like 21 and 25, but God can move, stretch, and grow anytime He desires.

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I will embrace who I am this year. I will embrace my calling, the love God has for me. I will embrace my dreams, my friendships, my seasons, the waves, and run hard after who I was created to be. My life can be messy, chaotic, adventurous, all at once but I choose to embrace the mess.

Romans 10:10-11 says With your whole being you embrace God setting things right, and then you say it, right out loud: “God has set everything right between him and me!” Scripture reassures us, “No one who trusts God like this – heart and soul – will ever regret it.”” (MSG)

I don’t know if you are having a birthday this month, but I do know that you too may struggle with accepting who you are, just like I do. I want to remind you that it is by grace, by faith you are saved. We embrace everything God is when we believe that He has the power to save us, and that fact continues as we grow and as He guides us to be who we are created to be. Change your perspective and allow those things you hate about yourself to be the very things that launch you into your destiny!

Just like scripture reminds us, no one who trusts God, heart and soul, will ever regret it.

Embrace the mess as you dance in His love.

xx,

Leslie Tatiana

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| Wedges: JustFab (similar) | Jeans: Abercrombie & Fitch (similar) |

| Blouse: Forever 21 (similar) | Necklace & Shades: Charming Charlie |

5 ways to attract Quality

Ladies.

Quality attracts quality. No not just in relationships, although it applies, but in everything you do. If you want the best of the best, you have to carry yourself in such a way that allows you to receive that. I am obviously a girl so I can only give you a girl’s perspective, but I always pray that this blesses you even if you are a gentleman, & though this particular one is directed to my ladies- guys you can learn a lot too 😉

  1. Dress how you want to be addressed. 

NO JUDGMENT ZONE OKAY!? But being treated like a lady and carrying yourself with a higher standard has a lot to do with how you dress. I love shorts and clothes and all things fashion but there is a line between fashion and being cute…. And just revealing your entire package to the world. You do not have to reveal everything you have to offer. The world does not need to know what your body looks like and how big how small…… etc. Being classy and acting like a lady means dressing like it too. I can’t expect people (not just guys) to respect me if I walk around dressed like I don’t have a mission, a calling, a greater purpose than just eye candy. Mmmm.

“Your dresses should be tight enough to show you’re a woman,

and loose enough to show you’re a lady.”

2. The words you speak, become the house you live in.

This is probably one the hardest ones for me out. I am impulsive, I speak when I want, i say what I want and I half the time don’t care how it comes across. But this isn’t always (most of the time) right. I truly believe that the tongue has the power of life or death and we do not understand the significance of it. I can create the atmosphere around me. I can tear or build others up. I can cause people to react to me a certain way because of how I speak of myself. My words, and yours, have that much power. Think of your life as the house…. What kind of house do you want to live in? Do you want one filled with drama, pain, low self esteem, negativity? Or do you want a house full of life, boldness, courage, love, and strength? A lady thinks of these things and plans her words well 😉

3. And you, you scare people because you are whole all by yourself.

You don’t need anyone to complete you, to survive, to pay your bills, to honestly…. Do anything. People should ADD to your life but should never be the reason you are alive and breathing. Part of being a lady is strengthening your ability to be independent. Of course I want to be loved the way I love, of course I like gifts and acts of kindness and all of it, but I don’t necessarily need it to be okay. I am well able to dream, grow, develop, and cultivate what I want from life all by myself. Anyone walking with me should ADD to that, not BE that.

4. A clean home is a happy home.

Literally & figuratively. I am in the process of getting rid of things in my room and in my home that I don’t use, (bc this is probably my longest lasting mountain LOL I will be working on this one till I die) It takes up space, makes it easier for me to make a mess out of more, and it’s clutter. I can’t tell you how stress- free it is getting into my car and not having a million and one things to sort through just to find my purse, or trying to remember where those cute shoes are. Such a waste of time and embarrassing!! Also…. Remember how your life is the home? Get rid of anything that is mess in your home, whether that is relationships, friendships, environments, habits, routines…. Whatever is not working- get rid of it.

5. Keep your heels, head, and standards high.

I LOVE HEELS, so yes. But on a serious note, those standards… This has happened to me so many times. I really liked a boy so I would forget everything I was taught, or everything I wanted to be. This is just ridiculous lol you don’t have to compromise your purity, your personality or your dreams for the sake of a significant other. NO. If he is the one for you, then guess what?! You won’t need to change your standards so they can catch up. They should already be running the race next to you, and if anything AHEAD of you, leading the way.

You will constantly be changing and growing. Your convictions will also change depending on your seasons and where you are in life. When I was in my teens, I was totally against shorts and bathing suits and all types of crazy strict dressing rules for MYself. And now that I am older, I love bathing suits and I will maybe wear a crop top. People are all different and not everyone will always agree, but my decisions are for me and for my circle of influence. Do the decisions I make today affect the girls who look up to me, my future daughters, and sisters across the nation? I truly believe they do and I would never want to cause people to question my beliefs, my dreams, or my calling as a lady. Obviously, you can’t please everyone!

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Carry yourself like you are worthy, like you have a purpose, and like you represent something bigger than yourself, because you do. The focus isn’t to attract a man, although that’s a plus(hallelujur), the purpose is to live a life of quality, one you can be proud of for genenrations to come.

Forever dancing in His love,

Leslie Tatiana

| Outfit |

| Jeans: Banana Republic (similar) | Blouse: Banana Republic | Shoes: Target (similar)           | Necklace: Forever 21 |